top of page

Dear Me, Dear God, Dear Future

I stand in awe of your glory

Afraid of you

Disconnected from your will and presence

I’m surrounded by your wonder

Having had a life of pain and trauma

Choked by it

Inhabited by it

Feeling lost, unworthy, broken, bruised

Tricked, teased

Under construction

The phrase:

“what have you done for me lately?”

Ringing in the back of my head

I struggle to connect with you

Don’t know what happiness looks like

Forgotten what joy and peace is

Knowing what I find rewarding

Knowing what makes my heart beat

Struggling to find purpose

Struggling to trust it

Trust me

For a lot of accountability I’ve taken

For most of it – not needed

Then who’s to blame

Under construction spiritually

Mentally exhausted

Emotionally broken

An unstable seesaw

Everyday a battle

Optimistically pursuing goals

Fighting to defeat hopelessness

Quick to anger

Resistant to love

To let ‘em in

Confidently knowing

I have a lot of love given to me

A lot of love to give

Confidently knowing

If given the chance

The opportunities

The platform

It will not be mismanaged

It will not be neglected

It will be used to its fullest potential

It will be cherished

For it you will be praised

Take my life if it isn’t

If I don’t

Take my life for failing you

For dishonoring your gift

A self-assurance is taking form

Last curtain call has been rescheduled

Fire growing bigger

Diablo won’t win

Discernment heightened

Diablo won’t win

Shedding dead weight

Pushing through the crowds of negativity

Diablo won’t win

Village solid

Back stronger

Shoulders back more

Head high more

What seems impossible today

Will be the testimony I tell tomorrow

No matter the demotivation or darkness

I somehow consistently showed up

That which was important

Reminder yes I can

I’m told I’m a

Conqueror, survivor, blessed

Warrior, very strong

Apparently that’s what they see in me

I pause

I exhale

Fed by the spirit of Hattie, Lamar, Lawrence, and Amanda

Let’s see what me and the rest of this life gonna be!

30 views0 comments


bottom of page