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Fucking vs. Making Love

This is a question that from time to time will resurface in my head. It is a very intriguing question. I am not intrigued due to the subject matter but yet the variety in responses that I received. What really is the difference between fucking and making love? For many it is the passion and emotional presence that makes making love different from fucking. What makes making love passionate? Is it the speed and the ferocity? Is it the foreplay? Is it the dirty talk? Is it the size of certain body parts? Is it how the genitals fit together? Is it because you are both fucked up on booze and drugs? Let's pretend the answer to all those questions is yes! Then what is the difference between making love and Fucking? Would you agree that making love should at least involve love? Making love passionately involves a bit more than just the 6-8 items listed above. Making love involves both people to be into each other beyond the sexual attraction/appetite. It means they both have a deep connection with each other in the mental, emotional, physical, and even sometimes spiritual departments. Most men and women forget, ignore, or just have no clue what intimacy really means. Intimacy in the 4 areas I mentioned above, is what makes the difference between making love and fucking. Even though many think that the two are one in the same. Please know that you can love someone and not make love to them. You can just “fuck” someone that you are in love with.


In relationships, one must maintain the creative juices flowing in and out of the bedroom. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with wanting a little quickie on occasion; believe it or not there are a profusion of women who take pleasure in a quickie without all the persnickety foreplay that accompanies love making. It is however a scientific fact that a woman’s body takes longer to warm up for sexual intercourse than a guy’s body because sex to most women is linked to love, as they are more emotional by nature than are men. Women want to feel more beautiful than they are, emotionally needed, and sexually arousing, with a deep sense of intimate connection with their lover. Women fall in love with their brain, men fall in love with their eyes; hence the reason women feel the need for foreplay and after play.


Foreplay isn’t something to be started ten minutes before sexual intercourse. Letting a woman know she is sexually attractive throughout the day, weather by a note, text, email, or phone (be creative, women love surprises) will make her a lot more receptive when you just want a quickie also. Women love the power men possess over them during a fast-paced quickie or vice- versa, let her take over you. She will be just as eager for a quickie without all the kissing, cuddling, and sappy talk as long as she feels treasured and desirable.

It’s difficult in our fast-paced society to engage in the art of love making all the time. Quickies are impulsive, primal, and animalistic, for the most part. It’s the excitement of forbidden locations at work, the mall, in the car, on the car, and many other creative places that make quickie sex the spice of life in a relationship. Quick fast paced sex sessions, that occupy those stolen moments in our lives, make both forget about the world, if just for a minute or two.


I remember when I was in the 11th grade I asked one of the coaches from the track team who was also a former teacher, what was the difference between fucking and making love? His exact answer to me, and I’ll never forget it was: “There is no difference. If you’re good at what you do you can do both at the same time.” In preparing to put this blog post together I wanted to acquire the opinions of individuals, just to see a variety of responses from a diverse group of people. Here are the top 10 responses to the question, What is the difference between fucking and making love:


1. Acting

2. Passion and intensity for love making. A damn wam bam thank ya ma'am for fucking

3. Fucking is that thing that happens after a few too many. Usually with someone you barely know, or a mistake you later regret making with a friend

4. Fucking is more so a person worrying about meeting their desired climax and making love is when both are considering/thinking of the other’s needs before theirs and not so much worried in reaching their own climax

5. Fucking is spontaneous, raw, carnivorous pleasure, it's competitive, hard and fast at the same time

6. You can fuck anyone, making love involves a connection

7. Huge difference making love has a natural rhythm and effortless flow because the two of you are attracted to each other on a deeper level than fucking. You're both trying to please each other and go to the next level together. Fucking is about individual pleasure. One may love it, the other may not.

8. Making love? It’s emotional. It has meaning, requires thinking and concern about performance, and you care about what the other person is thinking and feeling. Climax for both parties is a requirement

9. With one there is an emotional attachment the other no. Making love you get that "Waiting to Exhale" moment where you let yourself go and give in to that person with every inch of your being

10. Making love requires a cerebral connection. It's an intense expression of giving yourself wholly to another person and sharing each other's innermost thoughts and feelings

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