Having standards isn’t simply expecting that things will go a certain way, it’s focused attention on what you really WANT, then making the effort to change or get rid of anything that doesn’t meet your standards. When we turn our standards toward getting the kind of relationship we want, we shut out other options. If you decide to only spend your time on worthwhile people and pursuits, guess what you attract more of. Quality begets quality. Having standards includes getting clear on exactly what you want in a partner.
We all have a list of qualities that we’re looking for in a mate. For some of us the list is in our head and some may have actually written it down. Some will even have this as part of their vision board. You will have people who will tell you that you should throw away your list. I don’t agree with this. Without a roadmap, how are you going to get where you want to go?
I think people recommend throwing out your list because it can make people sabotage themselves by refusing to yield or creating impossible standards so that they can claim that they can’t get what they want. When we have a list, we need to be cognizant of what items we’re willing to compromise with and which ones are mandatory.
A self-assured attitude is inspiring for both you and the women you're talking to. Indeed, self-confidence is a matter of attitude. But like anything else, it can be acquired through practice and positive thinking. You might be wondering how you can improve your game, boost your self-confidence right away and get more women overnight.
A self-assured attitude is inspiring for both you and the women you're talking to. Indeed, self-confidence is a matter of attitude. But like anything else, it can be acquired through practice and positive thinking. You might be wondering how you can improve your game, boost your self-confidence right away and get more women overnight. Well, in the beginning, all you have to do is to play by the three-second rule.
You can blame the dating apps; because for the very, very first time in history, men and women have a ridiculous amount of choices available to them. At any given moment, a man or a woman can get on a dating app and get a potential date. Men and women go out on a date and if just one thing isn’t right, well, in the olden days, it used to be very simple. You know, let me figure out this person a little bit more. Let me see if this person’s really great. This thing that I don’t like tonight might have just been because they’re nervous or excited. But now? We evaluate each other immediately. Wait, she’s got a lazy eye. I don’t like that, I’m going to back on the dating app and I am going to swipe for somebody who’s perfect.
I love what the Huffington Post, says about this: There is no perfect. The thing that you need to realize is that this paradox choice that we have is just that. A paradox of choice. It’s too much stimulus in our world nowadays. There are too many speakers to look for when we’re looking for a pair of wireless speakers. Should we get Bluetooth? Or should we get airplay? Or should we get this? When we shop for cars, it seems like everybody, or every car manufacturer, has the same cars. The one line, two line, the three line, the four line, the five line. Are any of them even any different? What we’re doing here is just choosing the perfect car we want. We’re doing it with dating.
We can pick people apart the minute we meet them, because we know with all the options or apparent options that we have, we can go home that night and find what we perceive to be better. And that is dangerous…….
Life as a single person offers many rewards, such as being free to pursue your own hobbies and interests, learning how to enjoy your own company, and appreciating the quiet moments of solitude. However, if you’re ready to share your life with someone and want to build a lasting, worthwhile relationship, life as a single person can also be frustrating.
A lot of the ways that we think, as far as dating is concerned, comes from ideas and concepts that we’ve been taught. Be it through life experiences, the experiences of someone we know, words spoken to us from others, and or the thoughts of society; it affects, not necessarily in a bad way, how we view certain aspects of dating and relationships. In researching what others had to say about the troubles of dating. I came across a site called Helpguide.org. On this site they have a list of ideas and concepts about dating, which can honestly be categorized as myths. Instead of continuing or perpetuating the myths they provide more factual concepts instead. Take a look:
Common Myths About Dating and Looking for Love:
Myth: I can only be happy and fulfilled if I’m in a relationship or It’s better to have a bad relationship than no relationship. Fact: While there are health benefits that come with being in a solid relationship, many people can be just as happy and fulfilled without being part of a couple. Despite the stigma in some social circles that accompanies being single, it’s important not to enter a relationship just to “fit in.” Being alone and being lonely are not the same thing. And nothing is as unhealthy and dispiriting as being in a bad relationship.
Myth: If I don’t feel an instant attraction to someone, it’s not a relationship worth pursuing. Fact: This is an important myth to dispel, especially if you have a history of making inappropriate choices. Instant sexual attraction and lasting love do not necessarily go hand-in-hand. Emotions can change and deepen over time, and friends sometimes become lovers—if you give those relationships a chance to develop.
Myth: Women have different emotions than men. Fact: Women and men feel similar things but sometimes express their feelings differently, often according to society’s conventions. But both men and women experience the same core emotions such as sadness, anger, fear, and joy.
Myth: True love is constant or Physical attraction fades over time. Fact: Love is rarely static, but that doesn’t mean love or physical attraction is doomed to fade over time. As we age, both men and women have fewer sexual hormones, but emotion often influences passion more than hormones, and sexual passion can become stronger over time.
Myth: I’ll be able to change the things I don’t like about someone. Fact: You can’t change anyone. People only change if and when they want to change.
Myth: I didn’t feel close to my parents, so intimacy is always going to be uncomfortable for me. Fact: It’s never too late to change any pattern of behavior. Over time, and with enough effort, you can change the way you think, feel, and act.
Myth: Disagreements always create problems in a relationship. Fact: Conflict doesn’t have to be negative or destructive. With the right resolution skills, conflict can also be an opportunity for growth in a relationship.
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